Hi, I would like to introduce myself. My name is Andrea James and I'm a transgender activist. You may not have heard of me because you see; I have no legitimate claim to fame other than the fact that I am currently in a relationship with a person named Calpernia Addams.

What's that? You haven't heard of Calpernia Addams?

What about Barry Winchell? You see Barry and Calpernia were in a relationship (not at all gay!) and when rumors began to circulate around the military base that Barry was in love with a transgender showgirl, some transsexual hating bigots murdered him. Calpernia was subsequently thrown in the national spotlight showcasing the military's "Don't ask, Don't tell" policy.

In the true sense of Dr. Frankenfurter we decided "don't dream it, be it". Calpernia and I decided that the best way to profit from help the transgender community was to start a company and take our show on the road to Hollywood. We were able to sell our story of Barry and Calpernia's star-crossed love as a movie called "Soldier's girl".

More recently, Calpernia and I have helped coach Felicity Huffman in her role in Transamerica. So now everyone can see the difference that we have made by profiting bringing attention to the plight of the transgender community.

When I heard about Xeni's backlash, and subsequent smear campaign on the internet, I couldn't help but jump into the fray. Afterall we're fighting all forms of transgender hatred and although even we're not sure which side of the fence Xeni Jardin is on, we wanted to let her know that transgender blogging is OK and that we won't stand for any of this Xeni Sucks nonsense. Transsexuals should have a voice to blog with! Hopefully somebody will buy our movie rights for a story tentatively titled, "Blogger Bigotry: The story of Xeni Jardin"

Shouldn't come as news to anyone who has ever been to the post office. Naturally, the solution is that we give this same big government the responsibility of taking care of everyone's healthcare.

This is lame on a variety of levels:

1) Screen Captures of ASCII Art. Because the ASCII art, by itself, just didn't take up enough disk space.
2) People who used BBSs in the "80s and early 90s" are what we who were using the Internet back then refer to as "lame". Seriously, seriously lame.
3) Appealling to a nostalgia you had no part in originally: ALSO PRETTY LAME.

What's next? BITNET LISTSERV INBOX SCREEN CAPTURES? Maybe they could be "mashed-up" with some seriously hot dildo cozies?

Xeni doesn't know what "freestyle" means. Probably thinks Neil Young pioneered the form, as well. Mashup mashup blah blah blah.

Man in an elaborate woman costume, Jokestress has decided all that discussion prior to her reading this site was wrong, and has decided to go ahead and edit the Xeni Jardin page herself.

I looked at the xenisucks.com site and was pretty underwhelmed by the quality of the content. Further, the site really doesn't seem to be that notable. Alexa has it at 270,000th or something like that. The "criticism" is basically one tepid potshot for each BoingBoing post made by this article's subject. If you are going to rant on someone for their "lameness," your rants better not be lame in comparison.

Or what? You'll edit the Wikipedia page? OH NOES!!!1111 LOL DONGS.

Three words, "Jokestress": NEW YORK TIMES.

Thus making his "new" record apparantly culturally relevant. Why else would this be "Directory of Wonderful Things-worthy"?

Neil Young hasn't put out a good record, oh, say, ever, though the bloated tard of a "songwriter" sure has the knack of taking credit for all sorts of innovation he had nothing to do with. All the comparisons made to Dylan are entirely appropriate in my book, since in my humble opinion, Dylan single-handedly ruined rock music by bringing the hippies over. Oh, if only all those jackasses were kept corralled in by A Mighty Wind-esque revival concerts...

Yeah, why don't we take a cue from them?

Oh wait, that's right. We're America. Pick your side of the border you want to stand on, Xeni. No sense in being a hypocrite.

EFF: Oh noes! You did comprehensive automated wiretaps on citizens in order to datamine who may be threats to our country!
Government: Yeah, so watcha gonna do about it?
EFF: We're gonna... sue you! We'll get the information from you!
Government: Darn, we'd love to share the info but it's a secret.
EFF: :(

Rarely-used defense? Didn't see that one coming, Xeni? You're an asshat.

If president Bush announced plans to send peacekeepers to Darfur a week ago would you be decrying it as a nefarious scheme today? Would you be the one blogging about how we should stop sending out military forces without getting the UN on our side?

For one thing, Angelina Jolie already beat you to the punch. For another, are you going to take that shit from a breeder?

Must be nice sitting on yoour ass in california getting paid to post emails that other people sent you. Keep raising the bar, Xeni.

JUST DON'T LET THE PATRIARCHY HOLD YOU DOWN, BUY THESE SHOES!

So, lemme get this straight; what hookers need is high tech shoes, not, say, some legitimate job skills that would get them away from the disease and rape occupational hazards of their profession? Hell, Xeni, they could always take their lack of skills and become, like, tech journalists/bloggers, right? Oh, wait; that'd mean more competition for you. Nevermind, then.

Alternately, a nice H&K USP .45 would cost a lot less than some fucking shoes with a GPS and radio transmitter in them, and the H&K is available *now*, rather than being some bullshit vaporwear to be sold "in the future". Further, with the USP .45, hookers could prevent themselves from being raped, beaten, or killed in the first place, rather than just providing a beacon for the police to come scrape up their body after the damage has already been done.

Just sayin'.